Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time.
Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back, you wonder if your mother is right and figure that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism.
If you think things like this can’t happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from.
Are you being gaslighted? Check for these telltale signs:
Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse?
When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world?
Do you dread having small things go wrong at home—buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar?
Do you have trouble making simple decisions and constantly second guess yourself?
Do you frequently make excuses for your partner’s behavior to your family and friends?
Do you feel hopeless and joyless?
In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works, how you can decide which relationships can be saved and which you have to walk away from–and how to gas proof your life so you’ll never again choose a gaslighting relationship.
What is manipulation, how is it used in our everyday lives, and why is it such a prevalent force in our society?
Whether you consciously realize it or not, you use this tactic and have it used on you very often. Although some people have a negative association with the word, it isn’t always a bad thing, and can in fact help you a lot in life. Here are some of the concepts you will learn about in this book:
Automatic Mental Processes: Every single human on the planet has been conditioned to behave in certain ways as a response to particular stimuli. This is what makes us suggestible to influence and manipulation. Once you understand this process, you can use it to your benefit, and also to protect yourself from others.
Positive vs. Negative Manipulation: There are different types of manipulation, some which are beneficial to all involved, and others which are harmful and detrimental. In this book, you will learn to tell the difference between the two.
The Benefits of Positive Manipulation: Ethical manipulation, also known as persuasion or influence, is one of the most important social skills you can develop. When you master this, an entire new world opens up to you professionally, personally, and otherwise.
Protecting yourself from Negative Manipulators: There are always people out there who try to prey on others and use them for their own benefit. Once you become aware of the tactics they use, and why, you can effectively protect yourself from this happening to you. When you know what to watch for, you will never fall victim to a person like this.